Words to Live By

Happily married. 41. Infertile/perimenopausal. TV and iPod addict. Transplanted Canadian living in California. {Warning - abundant sarcasm and frequent *gasp* profanity lie herein.}

Sunday, January 02, 2005

A Few Words

I'd like to write a few words about herpes. Its not something that I generally talk about, for some reason its remained a shameful secret even though millions upon millions of Americans (and millions more world-wide) have this incurable virus. That's all it is, a virus. Something like 1 in 5 Americans have either type I or type II. That means that someone reading this has it. Not that I expect anyone to 'fess up or anything, but its still confounding to me that its something you just don't mention -- to anyone. Ever.

I know when I have an outbreak, which are, thankfully, fairly infrequent, I feel bad. Physically it zaps your energy because your body is fighting it, like if you had the flu. Emotionally, I feel bad because it means I can't be intimate with my husband, and it angers me when it flares up at the least opportune time, like now, for instance, when I'm getting ready to ovulate. It also reminds me of my ex, which always makes me angry. So its a big party all around.

For me, outbreaks are usually caused by stress. I think its safe to say that I've had a stressful week. Funny thing is, outbreaks can be caused by any number of things, including having your period, having sex, or even (worst of all), eating chocolate. Chocolate has a lot of arginine in it, which is the amino acid that the virus uses to replicate itself. So, I don't eat chocolate. I also can't take Fertility Blend, which has arginine in it. When I get an outbreak I take lysine, which is the opposite amino acid, and helps to starve the virus. Interesting stuff, eh?

I was also thinking this morning about the word infertility. I started to think, shouldn't it be UNfertility? But then, no, if you think about all the other words where if you put IN in front of it, it becomes something bad, it makes sense.

IN competent
IN complete
IN adequate
IN conceivable

That about sums it up, don't you think?

3 Comments:

At 9:28 PM, Blogger Sue said...

Happy Fucking New Year to you, too!!!

I think I have Herpes Simplex I...the oral kind. I don't want to insult you by saying I understand what you're going through, because I don't. But, I can empathasize. I've been getting cold sores/fever blisters for as long as I can remember. In the good old days, my dad used to put calamine lotion on them (do they still make that stuff?). In my 3rd grade picture I have a big pink scab on my lip. When I got older I used something called camphophinique (sp?) when it only came in a smelly liquid. I kept in an a little baggie with some q-tips in my purse. Sometimes it worked. Mostly, it just spread the virus down the side of my chin. I always feel so out of sorts when I'm dealing with these....ugly, greasy, shaky, lacking self-confidence and focus. The worst breakout I had was when I first moved to Southern California from Michigan. I went to the beach in March and didn't use any sunscreen on my lips. My mouth swelled up about 10 times it's normal size. I had a fever and had to miss a couple days of work. Just as some of the blisters were healing over and scabbing, others were forming and popping. Quite gross, actually. I was a mess. Ever since then I have been religious about keeping sunscreen on. I still have a few breakouts a year. A couple weeks ago I had 3 going on 3 different corners of my lips. Fun Fun. And as for sex....I supposed we could, but no kissing and no (you know), either. Causes: too much alcohol, not enough sleep, too many oranges, getting sick, sun, and the biggie....STRESS!!!

Wishing you less stress and more happiness in 2005, sweetie!

 
At 3:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

As though you don't have enough stress in your life. And while I'm sure it's never a treat, it's just insult to injury when it happens at an inopportune (IN-opportune) time. I'm sorry, sweetie.

 
At 11:12 AM, Blogger Tiff said...

No chocolate? I had no idea.
There are so many things that are totally common, but for some reason are socially not acceptable to talk about. That, I will never understand. Oh, I don't think you are missing out on anything with the Fertility Blend though..I think that crap is a big waste of money. (Iam sorry for saying that if anyone reading this has had any success with it)
I am sorry that this is something that you have to deal with on top of everything else.
((HUGS))

 

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